... well, sort of. It feels like it anyway. Better than a poke in the eye with a sharp implement anyway.
I am like one of those early morning listeners to a local radio phone-in. You know the kind of small cheesy radio station where you can win 98 point 5 dollars - 'cos that is their FM band - or they might even go up to $985 if they are feeling flush and it's a really difficult question about Madonna, or Taylor Swift, or the New Moon movie. (They are also those radio stations that use up all the daft letters of the alphabet to make up their name - KXZY type of thing - be great in Scrabble)
Well, yesterday - I was like that early morning listener. I let out a wee restrained squeal of delight. I am in the money.
I was sorting out some bits and pieces in the bathroom and I wanted to put a washbag/vanity bag/whatever-bag-you-call-it into the washing machine. I carefully emptied it of odd bits of cotton wool, one rusty razor blade, some post-it notes (?) and one of those little sachets of face mask that I always take on holiday in the vain hope of somehow finding the time to relax long enough to treat my face to a mini spa day. It's only about 4 years old.
And in the zipped back pocket of the wash bag was a small white sealed envelope. I took it out then gasped with recognition. I ripped it open - and yep, it was full of crisp new Canadian dollar bills. Equalling one thousand and eighty dollars to be exact.
How does one find $1080 in a bathroom? It's a fair question. And don't be mean about my slovenly and infrequent vanity bag washing habits here.
When we first moved to Canada in May 2007, I brought $5,000 in cash to get us through the first few weeks of accommodation, car hire and incidentals while we sorted out bank accounts. I thoughtfully split it up all the money into small bundles and hid it all over our luggage - to be on the safe side you understand.
One week later we moved into our home and another week later my husband and I had a fleeting and mystified discussion about how quickly we had gone through all that money. And then the idea was gone, we dismissed it and moved on. Other things were more pressing.
Two and a half years later, and here is the lost (thought spent) cash. And wow, what timing. It certainly takes the load off my mind for the Christmas season. Things like this never happen to me. And as you can imagine inside a busy and financially-pressed family home, the whole lot was allocated and accounted for within about three nano-seconds.
And whilst not being able to quite contemplate early retirement and a villa in France on my one thousand dollars, I did momentarily entertain the idea of not telling my husband and just arriving home one afternoon with handfuls of essential new clothes. Only momentarily though.
Well, OK - it was more than a moment, if I'm honest - but hey, I did the right thing ..... didn't I?